Thursday, October 25, 2012

Thursday October 25, 2012


I know it has been a while since my last post. Things have been just humming along nicely. I am still totally in love with my job, I am playing bass and singing again in the Mojave Moon Band, and I’m continuing to widen my quilting horizons. My CA-125 continues to be normal and life has been amazing.

However over the past year I had developed a gallstone and I had been having occasional symptoms. I felt burning pain in my mid chest, radiating to my back. Sometimes it would keep me up all night. It was extremely painful. In the week before Wed Oct 18 I had two such bouts. On Wed Oct 18 I had an exceptionally severe one and I was in pain all night. I went to work Thursday morning to help with the Great American ShakeOut but then left for the emergency room at St. Mary’s. Lindsay met me there. They did an ultrasound and found multiple gallstones. There was some concern that the radiologist saw a shadow on the liver. I had a CT scan with contrast and no stones showed in the duct. Also the radiologist did not see anything on the liver.

The pain continued and they wanted to make sure no stones had become lodged in the duct. So on Friday I had an MRI. I had been feeling very sick to my stomach the whole time. Not enough to actually need to throw up, but severe enough that I could not eat anything. The MRI was horrible. I was afraid that I would get into that tube and start to throw up and that they wouldn’t get me out fast enough. I was kind of strapped into a lacy metal contraption, and along with the tight tube, my claustrophobia reared its ugly head. There was no way I was going to be able to do it. They were going to send me back up to the room for meds, but the nurse called Lindsay, who was having dinner with Betty and Shannon across the street, and she came back. She told me I had to do it. So she stood outside the tube, holding my hands with my arms over my head and with that support I made it through. Lindsay saved the day once again.

It appeared that there were no stones in the duct, so I was scheduled for surgery the following morning, Sat, at 7am. The surgeon was going to try to remove the gallbladder the laparoscopic method, however due to my previous surgery last year that might not have been possible.  They might have to do an open surgery which would be much more invasive. He was also going to look at the liver to determine if he needed to take a liver biopsy.

They were able to do the laparoscopic method, although the surgeon said that it was very difficult to do. He said he did not see anything on the liver so no biopsy was taken. I still had not taken in any food by mouth. I slept most of Saturday while Betty and Shannon read electronic books.

On Sunday the surgeon came in to take out the drain and I nearly went through each ceiling on my way through the roof. They said they would not release me until I could eat. So I significantly reduced the pain meds and by Sunday night I could eat a few pears. I ate half a piece of French toast on Monday morning, and then Lindsay brought a 6” Subway tuna sandwich to me for lunch. I ate about a third of that. And I ate oyster crackers. I was past ready to come home.

They released me Monday Oct 23 around 5pm. The ride home on the dirt roads was much easier this time after surgery. Last year’s surgery was worse by many levels. Tuesday I pretty much rested all day. I read a book. Wednesday I did a little light housework and then when Shannon came home from work, we went out to the Saloon so I could practice for an hour. Today I’m feeling even stronger. I have plans to do more light housework and even some sewing. We will go out to the Saloon for another hour tonight when Shannon gets home. I am off work until Monday. I was supposed to be attending a conference that I had been looking forward to since summer vacation, but I had to cancel that. I’m disappointed but realize that “life happens”.

I go tomorrow to the surgeon to get the staples out. Then I know I need to give my body time to heal and revive. I still have to meet with my primary care doc when he gets all of the results of the tests to determine if I still need a liver biopsy. Since only one of the three tests indicated a problem and the surgeon did not see anything I will let that worry rest.

I’m not the kind of person who likes to have visitors when I’m sick. I kind of insulate myself to concentrate on the task of healing. I’m grateful for Shannon, Lindsay, and Betty being there and for all of those friends and family who kept me in there prayers. I know many people wanted to come by and see me and I really appreciate that concern. Please know that.

Big hugs to you all!

 

 

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Tuesday June 26, 2012


Hello!

I went to my surgeon yesterday for my 3 month checkup and all is well. My CA-125 from May 22 was 10.3 so everything is just right on the health front.

I attended my Ph.D. graduation on June 16 with my daughter Lindsay, son Wes, granddaughter Taylor, and husband, Shannon. I presented my paper to ITP on Friday June 15. Difficult to pare down 2 years of work and over 100 pages into a 15 min presentation, but I feel it went well. It was a whirlwind weekend that started and ended with the 7 hour drive up and back. I was so grateful for my family being there.

My last post mentioned that I had won one ribbon at the fair, but I didn’t know at that time about any others. Turns out I won two second place and two third place ribbons. So four out of the six quilts I entered, placed. I was really amazed and happy about that!

Mojave Moon is still rehearsing and getting better all the time. We have a great group and have become good friends as well as band mates. I try to practice at least three to four times a week. After this week, I’ll be able to bump that up to daily practice.

I haven’t done much sewing lately, but that will also change after this week. I want to sew, play music, read, meditate and go to the gym as my daily schedule starting next week. This is the first summer break in 6 years that I do not have any papers due or books to read. I am looking forward to concentrating on my creative, spiritual, and physical aspects for a change. Time to get out of the mental/intellectual part.

Hugs to you all!

Dr. Dar. J

Friday, June 1, 2012

Hi All!

I see it has been a few months since I last posted so I thought I’d give an update. -

On the heath front, all is well! I had my last CA-125 a week ago and it is holding steady at 10.3. I feel great, have lots of energy, and life is GOOD.

I received the following today…

Dear Darlene Packard-Mossman, Congratulations. Your submission, 10180 has cleared all of the necessary checks and will soon be delivered to ProQuest/UMI for publishing. In addition, all requirements of the ITP Dissertation Office have been fulfilled and the registrar has been notified of your completion. Regards, Institute of Transpersonal Psychology Administrator -

So I am COMPLETELY and TOTALLY FINISHED with the dissertation and I am officially Dr. Dar. I go in two weeks for graduation to put the icing on the cake. If anyone is interested in reading it, I’d be happy to email it to you. I’m sure it will be riveting and the best 118 pages you will ever enjoy! :)

I entered six quilts into the San Bernardino County Fair this year. Cristy went last weekend and found that I had received a 2nd place on one, but she could not find the other five. I’ll be going to the fair on Sunday so I’ll let you know if there are any other surprises. It has always been a feeling of such satisfaction to even enter my quilts into the fair. And to win a ribbon is such a shock every year. But it is nice to know that my quilting skills are evolving to the point that ribbons are awarded. I know I am up against some tough competition every year.

Our band, Mojave Moon, is still practicing weekly. We have a good group and it is really coming together. I am having a blast playing bass guitar again. Now that the Ph.D. is finished, I want to spend some time relearning how to read music. It has been a while but I know with some time it will come back to me. We have our first official gig at a club called Poison Ivy in Glen Ivy on July 7. Then we will be at Froggies in Apple Valley on Friday July 27th. We have a website started mojavemoonband.com so check it out for more details of upcoming events.

I am still totally in love with my job. Every day is a joy and I am grateful for each moment.

So all in all, my life is AWESOME! I just celbrated my 55th birthday yesterday. I’m looking forward to seeing what delights this next year will bring. I’ll keep you all posted.

Hugs! Dr. Dar

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Thursday February 16, 2012

Hi everyone! I just wanted to enter an update. Every month I go to have my porta cath flushed, which means they inject saline solution into it to make sure it doesn’t clot. They drew blood also and yesterday I got the results that my CA-125 was 10.6!!! That is the lowest it has ever been! I see the oncologist today for my 3 month visit. Then I have my 3 month visit to the surgeon on March 5. I’m still a bit anemic with my hemoglobin at 11.1 (normal is 12-14) but I feel that I have lots of energy. In fact, Shannon gave me a pair of turtle earrings as a reminder to slow down. I still have the neuropathy in my feet but I’m taking medication that seems to help it a bit. My toes are still numb but the bottoms of my feet are better.

On the dissertation front….my mentor/Chair has the first four chapters and has completed his review of the first three with very few editing comments. I know I have a few more pieces to add to the literature review (Chapter 2) but that will be very minor. This upcoming 3 day weekend, I plan to get those first four chapters completed and off to the editor on Tuesday. Then I will work on Chapter 5. I’m hoping that by the end of March I should be able to plan the date for my defense with my whole committee. After that, there are just administrational tasks to get the dissertation published. I plan to “walk” and publically receive my Ph.D. in Psychology on June 17, 2012. It has been a long journey and such an amazing learning experience. I am really glad I did this.

Our band finally has a name! We are officially “Mojave Moon”. We have a website…Mojavemoonband.com. Of course, there isn’t much there now, but we (meaning Shannon) will eventually be adding info, pictures, and upcoming gigs. We have our first gig already planned…we are playing for the entire 8th grade student body at our middle school. That will probably be our toughest crowd. So we are rehearsing weekly to prepare for that one and then in April we should be ready to start booking. I am taking weekly bass lessons and learning so much. I played bass for many years but never fully understood the whole instrument. Now I’m learning that there is a reason for the bass having more than the first two strings! :)

I have been completing quilting projects. I finally finished Betty’s tote bag that was her Christmas present and gave it to her last weekend. I have the binding machine sewn onto Cory’s quilt…just need to do the hand sewing. I have coffee cup blocks that I started for my friendship group the “Cut Ups” so I need to get them finished before next Wednesday. I turned in a UFO (unfinished objects) list for the President’s Challenge at my quilt guild (Pine Needles Quilt Guild) with 25 projects to complete. Yikes! But once the dissertation is completed, I can get most of these projects completed by the challenge deadline of October.

I am still totally in love with my job. Every day is a new experience and I love working with the students one at a time. I never have to do discipline and I get to encourage, motivate, and inspire students each day. It is so rewarding! There is never enough time to get to all of the things I want to do though. I have intentions of setting up a career center, going into classrooms and giving social skills/career/high school A-G requirements lessons, and starting a gay/straight alliance on our campus. But I realize I will not be able to accomplish all of these things this year. We will be having Career Day on May 30 where I will be inviting people in a variety of occupations to present to the students. If there is anyone who reads this who would like to talk about their career to 7/8 grade students, please let me know. :)

I think that is all for now. I will try to update this blog monthly.
Hugs to everyone!
Dar

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sunday January 15, 2012

Happy New Year to everyone! And it is a happy new year for me. Had my CA-125 two weeks ago and it is holding steady at 11.8. Of course I started to panic as it has gone from 11.4 to 11.5 and now 11.8. But I was assured that it is well within the max of 35. Again, it is like any blood test or somatic measurement. It will fluctuate from time to time. As long as it doesn't go up significantly, I'm ok. Yay!!

I'm still anemic but not by much. 11.2 which is just under the 12 that is the low end of normal. But I have lots of energy and I feel great!

My job is AWESOME!!! I wake up each morning with excited anticipation, looking forward to what the day will bring. :)

I am busily working on my dissertation. I spent all day yesterday and I'll be at it all day today and tomorrow. I plan to have a draft of Chapter 4 winging its way through cyberspace to my chairperson by tomorrow afternoon. Then while he is looking through that, I'll be starting Chapter 5. These are the last two chapters of the paper. I'm sure I will have to edit these as they go through the various phases...chairperson...editor...committee...and final edit check, but I can see that the completion of this project is in sight. I fully plan to be flying to Palo Alto on June 16 to graduate with that Ph.D. Yipppeeee!

I am so grateful for all of the blessings in my life. I am daily grateful for what, I'm guessing, many people take for granted. I'm grateful for being able to take a shower and get out of bed without help, I'm grateful for being able to breathe and eat, and for having enough hair to use shampoo instead of bar soap. I'm grateful that I don't have to wear my hair hat anymore. I'm grateful for the adventures I can enjoy with quilting and the new version of music with playing bass again and being in a band.

Most of all I'm grateful for all of the AMAZING friends and family I have in my life. My quilting sisters, my Pinkie sisters and Jen, my band members, my coworkers within AESD, the students at my site who check in with me daily just to say hi, Cristy, my mentor Mark Brady, my Channel 7 friends from high school days, my family; Shannon, Lindsay, Wes, Taylor, Sean, Cory, Betty, Allan, Nancy, and the rest of the extended family. Wow this list sounds good for my acknowledgment page of my dissertation! :)

Thank you all for your love. Right back at 'cha. :)

Hugs,
Dar